


Don’t Leave

by idrilsdarkwritings (idrilhadhafang)



Series: Writer’s Month 2019 [2]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Comfort Sex, Dark Darkpilot, First Order Poe Dameron, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nipple Licking, Nipple Play, Protective Poe Dameron, Smut, Weird Fluff, Young Ben Solo, Young Poe Dameron, shuttle sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-08-13 04:56:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20168509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilsdarkwritings
Summary: What if Poe joined Ben in the First Order?





	Don’t Leave

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: For the prompt “hurt/comfort”. Sorry it took so long; had writer’s block. Also, don’t know how hurt/comfort it is, but still...
> 
> Title from “True Love Waits” by Radiohead.

It was at nineteen years old that Ben Solo has to flee from his uncle. Even stumbling away from the wreckage of the hut, he knew that the other Jedi would inevitably come looking for him. He couldn’t face them. Not after what he’d done — even if it was in self-defense. Even stumbling towards Poe’s house, it felt like the closest thing he could get to safety. A lighthouse in a storm. 

Ben knocked on the door and Poe stumbled out. “Ben? Are you okay? You look like hell.”

Ben forced a smile. “You could say that.”

”What happened?”

Ben could only watch Poe’s eyes widen even as Ben explained everything to him. Waking up to find Luke’s lightsaber ignited over him, for example. And even explaining he had to leave —

“I’ll go with you.”

”You don’t know what you’re saying,” Ben said. “What if you and BB-8 never see your father again? Or your friends?”

“I made my choice a long time ago,” Poe said. “Where you go, I follow. I’m never going to leave you.”

That...Ben didn’t know what he had done to deserve someone as wonderful as Poe. He only knew he had to hold onto him, as long as possible. 

***

The shuttle they’d “borrowed” was quiet even as they all but immersed themselves in hyperspace. BB-8 had powered down, and Ben was just looking out the viewing window of the shuttle. Even looking out at the blue vortex that symbolized hyperspace, Ben couldn’t help but feel almost like he’d been kicked in the chest by a Gamorrean. It was one thing to be having...struggles with his previously close relationship with his uncle. It was quite another to actually wake up to the sight of an ignited lightsaber. When your uncle, who was supposed to protect you, to love you, tried to do something so horrible...

(It was a good thing that Ben had woken up in time, he thought. Otherwise...)

”Hey.” Poe’s voice was soft, gentle. Somehow stabilizing in the mess of hyperspace that was starting to bore through Ben’s head. “You’re safe, Ben. You’ll always be safe.”

”I don’t know,” Ben said. “I don’t think I’ll ever be safe again.”

”I can help.”

”Yeah.” Ben smiled faintly. “You can help. I know you can help."

”Good.” Poe placed a hand on his shoulder, and Ben felt his heart flutter despite himself. Poe’s touches tended to do that, and Poe really didn’t know what he was doing to him, did he? Just being touched, sheltered like this. “Are you okay?”

”I think I am,” Ben said. “At least...I have you.”

Poe paused. “You have me?”

”Yes. I mean...you’re my friend.” Ben almost didn’t want to say that he wanted more than that. “My best friend.”

Poe looked away. Somehow, he seemed to be hesitating, almost disappointed. Why would he...except in a way, Ben already knew. 

What would Poe see in a young man like him? Someone who had to be really, really bad to have his uncle nearly do what he did? After all, he knew that he was just...wrong inside. He wasn’t worthy. Not like Poe was. Poe was the brightest of lights, and Ben was...nothing. Maybe less than that. 

“Ben,” Poe said, “When I learned he nearly killed you...it was one of the worst things he could have done.”

”I...am a monster. You don’t know what I had inside my head...”

”You’re not a monster,” Poe said. “Not to me.”

”Why are you still here?” Ben said. “I’m glad, but...”

”You’re not just my best friend.” 

It clicked in Ben despite himself. “You love me.”

”Yes.” Poe’s voice cracked. “I loved you when I decided to step onboard this trip to nowhere, and I love you now.”

Ben paused a moment. He couldn’t help but be afraid — not of Poe, but the very idea of being loved. Being loved — what was that like? Being completely, utterly unafraid. Safe with Poe —

“I love you too,” Ben finally said. And he swore that Poe’s face became practically radiant with relief. 

“I was afraid you wouldn’t think so.”

”I do, and I will. Forever.”

They were close. So close. How near they were was enough that Ben could all but count his eyelashes. The fine lines of his lashes contrasting with olive skin. 

Finding the other’s lips was intimidating, but it was worth it feeling the softness of Poe’s lips under his own. Ben’s hands tangled in Poe’s hair, and he swore that he could feel a strange sort of heat in him. It wasn’t just desire, but a need to simply be connected with Poe, to be complete. 

He broke away, looking at Poe and gasping for air. “Poe...if we went further, are you okay with that?”

”Oh, stars. I’m more than okay with that.”

Removing clothing was difficult in that small shuttle, and Ben wondered absently if Poe’s clothing was all but designed to be at least slightly difficult, but it was worth actually removing it to see how beautiful Poe really was. Even seeing him shirtless and then naked, Ben needed him, wanted him terribly. Needed to taste, to worship, to love him. 

“You’re gorgeous,” Ben said. He took in the expanse of Poe’s golden-bronze skin, the delicate sculpt of his shoulders and his flat-yet-soft belly. His pecs too, well-defined. “So...gorgeous. I don’t know where to start.”

”I can help. The nipples are pretty sensitive, just to begin with...”

Ben followed Poe’s lead, kissing and licking at Poe’s nipples and taking pleasure in Poe’s moans and whimpers. He knew enough about Poe as a friend; it was different knowing him as a lover. Even as they moved towards the bedroom, Ben licked and nibbled at Poe’s throat, just searching for what could make his lover feel good. Poe did the same, and Ben ached — ached to go further, but just as Poe was about to pull him down towards the bed...

”Poe,” Ben said. “I can’t. You’re too small.”

”Okay,” Poe said. “We can work with that.”

”Meaning?”

”Ben Solo, if you’re so worried about crushing me, at least let me be on top.”

Stars, but Poe was going to be the death of him. “Please,” Ben murmured.

Ben lay down as Poe climbed on top of him, bottle of lube in hand, and he couldn’t help but feel a sort of awe even at the sight of Poe straddling him. The fact that this beautiful, radiant being wanted him so badly, was going to ride him...well, it made Ben’s cock ache and throb all the more. 

Poe had to prepare himself, of course, inserting a lube-soaked finger and hissing at the stretch. The anxiety Ben felt took his mind off his throbbing cock, and he couldn’t help but wonder if Poe was okay, if he wanted to do something that wasn’t difficult instead. 

“Poe?” he said. 

“I’m okay,” Poe gasped. “It’s just...new. I think it’s a little tight...”

Ben nodded, still worried despite himself. 

Finally, Poe was ready. Ben slicked his shaft (that was better. Less vulgar than “cock”) and let Poe sink on to it, and — oh stars. 

Poe was hot around him, hot and tight, and Ben groaned in pleasure, moving his hips to thrust into that tight, warm space. It didn’t help that Poe’s thoughts were all but spilling over from where the older man was practically impaling himself on Ben’s cock — and it felt vulgar even thinking the word “cock”, but it was like in the throes of pleasure, it didn’t really matter. Poe’s thoughts were all but rambling about how good Ben felt inside him, and the knowledge that he was making Poe feel good was enough to make Ben feel a sort of pride. 

“How do you feel?” Ben rolled his hips experimentally, shifted them upwards, and Poe actually cried out in pleasure. 

“I think you hit something sensitive,” Poe gasped. 

“You need more?”

”I need more. Again, Ben...”

They worked together, trying to hit that sensitive spot inside Poe with each thrust, and Ben encouraged Poe to touch himself. He looked so beautiful like this, and Ben needed him. Not just physically, but all of him. Poe moaned every time Ben succeeded in hitting that perfect kriffing spot, and Ben cried out even thrusting into that heat. He could feel Poe trembling, shaking as Ben continued to make love to him, and stars, he could feel the need to come in his body, but Poe was more important. 

“Love you,” Ben murmured. “Need you...love you so kriffing much...”

”I know, Ben. I know. I love you — I need you. Oh Ben...” Poe was shaking, trembling, and his thighs...they were gripping Ben, and Ben could feel like he would burst. “Oh, darling...Ben!”

Poe practically exploded into his own hand, and he was so beautiful as he trembled and moaned that Ben stopped his shifting inside Poe I’d only to watch him come apart. Ben shifted inside Poe, inside the body of perhaps the most beautiful man in the galaxy, and after shifting, grinding, thrusting (much to Poe’s pleasure), he all but burst inside Poe’s body. It seemed relentless, before finally, Ben lay back, exhausted, feeling his need to be inside Poe abate and be replaced with a gentler, warmer need. 

Poe had to slip off him, and get off him. Ben murmured in discomfort at the loss of Poe’s weight on him, but Poe joined him again, snuggling beside him in bed. “Hey,” Poe said, gently. “I’m here, you know?”

”I know.” The delirium of adoration, of worship, had died down to a slower burn of closeness and care. “Stars...that was wonderful.” 

“Can’t disagree,” Poe said. He sighed. “I’m going to be sore in the morning.”

”I’m sorry.”

”No, it was worth it.” Poe kissed him lightly. They couldn’t simply go back to being friends after something this big. And yet, Ben thought, it was probably the only good thing that had happened that night. 

They drifted off to sleep, and just this once, Ben couldn’t help but feel like they were safe, even in the uncertainty of hyperspace. 


End file.
